Judith Guest’s “Ordinary People”

Ordinary spate Ordinary People by Judith Guest is the story of a dysfunctional family who relate to one other through a series of extensive defense mechanisms, i. e. an unconscious process whereby reality is distorted to conquer or prevent anxiety. The book opens with seventeen year old Conrad, son of upper middle-class Beth and Calvin Jarrett, legal residence subsequently eight months in a psychiatric hospital, thither because he had attempted self-importance-annihilation by slashing his wrists. His mother is a meticulously orderly person who, J ard, through projection, touchs despises him.She does all the right things attending to J ards physical eeds, keeping a spotless home, plays golf and bridge with other women in her social circle, but, in her own words is an emotional cripple. Jareds father, raised in an orphanage, seems anxious to please everyone, a prosaic reaction of individuals who, as children, experienced parental indifference or inconsistency. Though a success ful value attorney, he is jumpy around Conrad, and, according to his wife, drinks also m any martinis. Conrad seems consumed with discouragement.A return to normalcy, school and home-life, step up to be to a greater extent than Conrad can handle. Chalk- typesetters cased, hair-hacked Conrad seems bent on erpetuating the family myth that all is well in the world. His family, after all, are people of good taste. They do non discuss a problem in the face of the problem. And, besides, there is no problem. Yet, there is not one problem in this family but two Conrads suicide and the death by drowning of Conrads older brother, Buck. Conrad eventually contacts a psychiatrist, Dr. Berger, because he feels the air is full of flying deoxyephedrine and wants to feel in control.Their initial sessions to irritateher frustrate the psychiatrist because of Conrads inability to express his feelings. Berger cajoles him into expressing his emotions by saying, Thats what happens when you unsay this junk, kiddo. It keeps resurfacing. Wont leave you alone. Conrads slow but steady journey towards healing seems kick downstairsially the result of cathartic revelations which hurtle guilt feelings regarding his brothers death and his familys denial of that death, plus the love of a good woman.Jeannine, who sings soprano to Conrads tenor in that location is no doubt that Conrad is consumed with guilt, the feeling one has when one acts contrary to a role he has assumed while interacting with a ignificant person in his life, This guilt engenders in Conrad feelings of low self esteem. Survivors of horrible tragedies, such as the Holocaust, frequently express similar feelings of worthlessness. In his book, Against All Odds, William Helmreich relates how one survivor articulates a feeling of abandonment. Did I abandon them, or did they abandon me? Conrad expresses a similar thought in recall the sequence of events when the sailboat they were on turned over.Buck soothes Conrad saying, Okay, okay. Theyll be looking now, for sure, just hang on, dont posit tired, promise? In an imagined conversation ith his dead brother, Conrad asks, Man, whyd you let go? Because I got tired. The hell You never get tired, not before me, you dont You tell me not to get tired, you tell me to hang on, and then you let go I couldnt help it. Well, screw you, then Conrad feels terrible anger with his brother, but cannot comfortably express that anger.His psychiatrist, after needling Conrad, asks, Are you mad? When Conrad responds that he is not mad, the psychiatrist says, Now that is a lie. You are mad as hell. Conrad asserts that, When you let yourself feel, all you feel is lousy. When his psychiatrist questions im slightly his relationship with his mother, Calvin says, My mother and I do not connect. Why should it bother me? My mother is a very private person. This sort of response is called, in mental literature, rationalization. We see Conrads anger and aggression is displaced, i. e. vented on another, as when he physically attacked a schoolmate.Yet, he also turns his anger on himself and expresses in extreme and dangerous depression and guilt. Guilt is a normal emotion felt by most people, but among survivors it takes on special meaning. Most feel guilty ab come on the death of loved ones whom they feel they could ave, or should have, saved. Some feel guilty about situations in which they behaved selfishly (Conrad held on to the boat even after his brother let go), even if there was no other way to survive. In answer to a query from his psychiatrist on when he last got really mad, Conrad responds, When it comes, theres always too much of it.I dont know how to handle it. When Conrad is finally able to express his anger, Berger, the psychiatrist says to Calvin, Razoring is anger self-mutilation is anger. So this is a good sign turning his anger superficial at last. Because his family, and especially his mother, frowns upon ublic displays of emotion, Conrad keeps his feelings bottled up, which further contributes to depression. Encyclopedia Britannica, in explicating the dynamics of depression states, Upon close study, the attacks on the self are revealed to be unconscious expressions of disappointment and anger toward another person, or even a item deflected from their real direction onto the self.The aggression, therefore, directed toward the outside world is turned against the self. The article further asserts that, There are three cardinal psychodynamic considerations in depression (1) a deep sense of loss of what is oved or valued, which may be a person, a thing or even liberty (2) a conflict of interracial feelings of love and hatred toward what is loved or highly valued (3) a heightened overcritical concern with the self. Conrads parents are also busily engaged in the business of denial.Calvin, Conrads father, says, Dont worry. Everything is all right. By his own admission, he drinks too much, because drinki ng helps , deadening the pain. Calvin cannot tolerate conflict. Things must go smoothly. Everything is jello and pudding with you, Dad. Calvin, the orphan says, brokenheartedness is ugly. It is something to be afraid of, to get id of. Safety and order. Definitely the priorities of his life. He constantly questions himself as to whether or not he is a good father.What is fatherhood, anyway? Beth, Conrads mother, is very self-possessed. She appears to have a highly developed super-ego, that part of an individuals personality which is moralistic , meeting the demands of social convention, which can be irrational in requiring certain behaviors in spite of reason, convenience and common sense. She is furthermore, a perfectionist. Everything had to be perfect, never mind the impossible blow it worked on her, on hem all. Conrad is not unlike his mother. He is an overachiever, an A student, on the swim team up and a list-maker.His father tells the psychiatrist, I see her not be able t o forgive him. For surviving, maybe. No, thats not it, for being too much like her. A psychoanalyst might call her anal retentive. Someone who is fixated symbolically in orderliness and a tendency toward perfectionism. Excessive self-control, not expressing feelings, guards against anxiety by controlling any expression of emotion and denying emotional investment in a thing or person. She had not cried at the funeral. She and Conrad had been strong and calm throughout.The message of the book is contained in Bergers glib saying that, People who keep ladened upper lips find that its damn hard to smile. We see Conrad moving toward recovery and the successful worry of his stage of development, as articulated by Erikson, intimacy vs. isolation. At story end, his father is more open with Conrad, moving closer to him, while his mother goes off on her own to work out her issues. Both trying to realize congruence in their development stage (Erikson), ego integrity vs. despair.